GI Joe Renegades: Law & Order

Because I was a very foolish teenager, my GI Joe collection consists entirely of 25th anniversary and forward figures. This is for two reasons (other than the aforementioned 15 year old idiot trying to be too cool for toys)- A) The modern figures, with a few exceptions, are cheap like borscht. I'm a pretty broke dude at the moment, so if I can have my plastic habit without spending too much cash, then all the better. Which leads right into the second reason- B) There's so much cool ARAH stuff out there, I know when I open that door, it'll explode like a dam breaking. So I need to keep the door firmly closed until my financial situation is much more comfy.

So when I rediscovered my love for all things Joe a few years ago, I set about recreating my childhood collection with the updated figures. When the 25th anniversary line ended with so many holes left in the original lineup, I was pretty disappointed. I figured the movie universe would more or less take over and that'd be it for the classic looking figures. But then the big H started doing something fun- They started to sneak long awaited additions to the 25th anniversary lineup, in full classic looking style, into the other toy lines. They tended to stick out like sore thumbs, but the hardcores didn't care. The Rise of Cobra movie line, which I really don't like on the whole- too many bulky accelerator suits and jumbo ridiculous launchers, gave us Monkeywrench and Kamakura, the Resolute line gave us Shockwave and Tunnel Rat. Even the Pursuit of Cobra line had the fan favourite Low Light. And now, although Hasbro is already spoiling us collectors with the 30th anniversary line, the Renegades cartoon tie-in gives us Law & Order.

                                     

If you compare Law & Order with other figures from the Renegades line it becomes immediately clear that one of these things is not like the other. The majority of the Renegades line keeps the simplistically stylized cartoon look of the show, whereas Law & Order are much more at home with the realistically molded 30th anniversary line. The only thing cartoony about this pair is Law's gargantuan badge. It's practically the size of his face!

 One thing that is certainly not cartoony is the sheer amount of firepower this guy is packing- He's got a compact little SMG, a pretty badass riot shotgun, a little silenced 9mm (courtesy of another reuse of the legs of good ol' Snake Eyes v54) & a not so little Magnum hand cannon. He also sports a tonfa for beating your ass, a visor so he doesn't get your blood all up in his face, and a pair of cuffs for taking you out of the fight.

 Hasbro really brought it with the detail and volume of accessories with the PoC line, but I've heard that they want to start saving a little money with the accessories. That would certainly explain my biggest bitch about this figure- They don't pack in a repaint of the Cobra Shock Trooper's amazing riot shield. How much of a natural would that be? Ah well, I guess there's always Marauder John. But the cutback rumor would also explain another thing I found odd- The new weapons are a little... basic. Some of the outstanding detail seen just a year ago with those great PoC weapons seems to be gone. The guns & tonfa still look cool, they just kinda look... Blocky, I guess?

And then there's the mother of all accessories- Order herself (I'm not sure of Order's canon gender, but she's always been female to me). Well, it's a good looking mold- she looks friendly, but with with a definite edge. The pack mule jacket wouldn't have been my choice, but it's fine. Same goes for the... What the hell is this bib thing? Bulletproof vest? I guess?

 But seriously- Did they have to mold the thick plastic leash right to poor Order's neck? I guess there's a lot of bulk around that neck already, and they didn't want to add any more? But why have all that bulk in the first place? I don't get it. So Order, despite being a good looking dog mold, can't ever be without her master because if no one's holding the leash, it looks like she's beginning a transformation into Venom.

And speaking of her master, How's Law look? Pretty damn good! He's got a really cool head sculpt- but there's one little problem with his handsome coif- It makes his helmet sit kind of awkwardly on his head. But we're really getting into nitpicking territory at this point- It's a reasonable tradeoff for a head sculpt with a little extra personality.

He rocks the Shock Trooper vest hard- It looks like it was made for him. My only complaint is that there's no place for the cuffs or tonfa- although he can dangle the cuffs from behind his head, for all the good that'd do him.

Did I say he reuses the legs of SEv54? That's true of the upper legs, but the lower legs are new, at least to me. It's not often you see a Joe with pant cuffs, usually they're rockin' the boots, so it kind of sticks out for me. I thinks it's a cool detail, although he should really think about hitting a tailor- It looks like these are Roadblock's handmedowns.

I know I've done a lot of complaining in this post, but I really do like Law & Order. My current collection may be larger than my collection was when I was a kid, but it still has some big holes in it. Law & Order was one of those holes, and these two will do very nicely, thank you very much. And above anything else- It gives me hope that now that the 30th anniversary line is more or less done (for the time being, at least), we may still see some surprises along the way. Like Kwinn. I want Kwinn, Hasbro, and I know you've got him- You can't fool me! I'm begging you not to make it a SDCC exclusive! I must honor the Spirit of the Bear and the Spirit of the Weasel, although he may whisper poison in my ear. Kwinn must be added to my collection!

Ahem. Sorry,  I just read GI Joe #19, and am all emotional.

Order! Down, girl!

The long arm of the law.